For students coming from near and far, the Catholic Center at Rutgers is a home away from home. We are the support and the family for these young men and women providing a secure foundation as they continue on their journey. And, as Rutgers student Jian’s story reveals, we are often their light in times of darkness and doubt.
For Jian, home was China. His childhood was marked by the loss of his mother at an early age as well as extreme poverty. “We could not even afford to eat rice every day, not to mention meat. I used to catch sparrows, frogs, grasshoppers, dragonflies or whatever I could to eat as a source of protein. It sounds a little bit hard to believe, but that was actually how I spent my childhood.” And it was only more hardship that followed. With the death of both his father and beloved grandfather, he admits he fell into a dark place.
“I felt like my whole world collapsed. Hope was slipping away from my life. At my college near Shanghai, I resorted to alcohol and smoking to relieve the pain. I kept bottles of liquor in my dorm room and I couldn’t go to sleep without getting drunk. Those were the darkest days of my life. I would cry my pillow wet in the middle of the night and ask why God would take all my family away when I was only 21 years old.”
For Jian, the decision to leave China and follow a fellowship at Rutgers University offered the hope of leaving all of that sadness behind. “But again, life didn’t go the way I wanted it to be. In China, I may not have had family, but I still had friends. However, in America, I found myself even sadder. I was out of sorts asking the same old questions. Where is the love? Does the universe care about me? I felt like I was an outcast. Never had I felt lonelier.”
A chance search on YouTube – a video featuring the song “Ave Maria” – offered him the feeling of love that he desperately sought. “I learned about the Catholic faith from textbooks and TV shows, but I never thought it would have anything to do with my life. In this moment, hearing this song, I felt like Mother Mary was holding me in her arms. I realized this might be what I was looking for all along. I did not hesitate. I Googled ‘Rutgers Catholic’ immediately.”
Alone in a new land, driven by a mix of desperation and hope for the future, Jian found what he was looking for at the Catholic Center at Rutgers. Introduced to the building, its staff and its students, John found home almost immediately. “They didn’t feel like strangers to me. Instead they felt like family.” And with that, he realized he was no longer alone. Instead, he found a community united as one family and one faith regardless of geographical origins.
Jian’s story is relatable to all of our students no matter how far they’ve traveled on their voyage. Each student who has packed up and embarked on the journey of college understands the feeling of the sudden loss of familiar footing and the challenge of orienting oneself to this new environment. The Catholic Center at Rutgers strives to remind students that they need not face these challenges alone; that we are one family in Christ, here to provide the love and support just as their families from home do. This is accomplished with a very visible presence. Not only is the Catholic Center centrally located in New Brunswick, but the Brothers expand their presence beyond the building continuously as active participants in the school community. Whether it’s joining students for tailgating before a big game or holding meetings in the dorms, their message is shared throughout the campus, calling students home.
“I’m inspired by so many people at the Catholic Center and the Church. Father Peter and Father Keith—I enjoy every single one of their homilies; they are such great speakers. Brother Parker, Brother Patrick and Brother Joseph—they are not just brothers with the capital letter B, but also they are my brothers in real life. And also all the students in the Catholic Student Association— I feel the family love from every one of them,” explains Jian. “Now I understand God is love and He works through His people, His community.”